We were in Ethiopia. A nanny handed us a baby. I was so nervous that I hardly noticed it wasn’t our daughter. Then I laughed and laughed and handed the correct baby to the woman from Texas. I waited patiently for the nanny to bring out our daughter.
729 Days ago I wasn’t a mother. Legally yes, but did i feel like a mother? No. Not until they handed her to us. It was only then that I could feel the ease and burden of the adoption process lift from our shoulders. Not until we could bring her home. Not until we could raise her.
Today, 730 days later it feels so normal. It feels like she has been with us forever. She is SO our kid. She is funny, smart, highly verbal. She is a peanut who can stand up for herself. Today she dropped something and said “oh damn it”. For better or worse she is a mini me. Yesterday I bonked my head on the end of a table when I went to pick something up. She said “mommy come here” and kissed my booboo.
She is a total Daddy’s girl, and although I am funny, it’s Andy that gives her fits of giggles.
She knows that she is adopted and that she was born in Africa “theopia” as she calls it. She knows she has family there and they love her very much. She knows that she has family here who love her and love her family in Ethiopia very much.
Sometimes I feel guilty for having the usual litany of maternal complaints. She is very very very 2 1/2 and that comes with the temper tantrums, the fits of running away, the dumping water out of the bathtub. We wanted, longed and fought for her so much, that it might seem like I am not appreciating her. Actually that’s not true. I am a complainer by nature. I actually appreciate the normalcy that comes with two years home. She is not a fragile porcelain doll or a figment of my imagination. She is real, whole, independent, frustrating, strong and mighty. She is our girl. She 100% us, mixed with the mystery of her first family.
Her Ethiopian name Dinkinesh means “miraculous and amazing”. Even though her first parent knew her for such a short time, the name couldn’t be more fitting. She is truly amazing. Truly truly a miracle.
Happy familversary to us.