I met my friend Marie years and years ago. We met at work and were both miserable. It was a large company and we were kind of drawn to each other. One day she sent me an email that basically said “hey, your funny and cool do you know any guys that you could fix me up with.” My friend Marie has some guts. I did, in-fact fix her up with a friend of mine who turned out to be the worst boyfriend ever. EVER. At least we got a lifelong friendship out of the deal.
Marie is one of those people that you can call up in a pinch and she will make you laugh and cry simultaneously that you hick-cup for air. She will let me know when I am being neurotic or a bitch and I love her for it. There are very few people who can be so honest with you that they can say anything. I feel amazingly lucky that she is in my life. Yeah, we have each others backs.
When we both lived Brooklyn we were neighbors and hung out all the time. Marie (at the time) was a single mom to then 6 year old Madeline (who Andy calls Madge) and both of them became everyday fixtures in our lives. Young Madge was one of the funniest, silliest, smartest kids I have ever had the pleasure to know. I have such a strong visual image of Madge cuddled up on Andy’s lap watching Bridge Over the River Kwai. Cool parents make really cool kids.
About 8 years ago they moved to Texas. Life has progressed for them amazingly well. Marie is remarried to a man who adores (and puts up) with her. Madge has blossomed into someone i can only hope our future kid can aspire to be. She is beautiful, talented, confident and worldly.
So when I think about the kind of parent I want to be, I think of Marie and Madge. When we started this process we asked Marie write one of our letter of recommendation. Madge wrote one too. It is on our fridge and we show it to literally EVERYONE who enters our house.
Our adoption delays have hit me kind of hard and I have been feeling kinda blue. On top of it today Andy and I got some really really terrible news about some dear friends of ours. I want to protect their privacy but lets just say it makes what we are going through look like nerf ball practice. After I got off the phone with Andy i didn’t know who to call until I thought of Marie. After we both cried Marie said the most amazing thing to me. She said “Lisa, nothing in the world makes you feel more vulnerable then becoming a parent.”
I love my friend Marie with all of my heart.